"Well, well," said absent-minded Prof. Warner, as he stood knee-deep
In the bath tub, "what did I get in here for?" 
A prisoner was brought before a police magistrate. He looked around and discovered
that his clerk was absent. "Here, officer," he said, "what's
this man charged with?" 
"Bigotry, your honor," replied the policeman, "he's got three
wives." 
The magistrate looked at the officer as though astounded at such ignorance.
"Why, officer," he said, "that's not bigotry-that's trigonometry."
James--"Oh, don't touch me! You'll get lint on me." 
Miss Ewbank (Eng. IV)    "We will take the life of Johnson tomorrow.
Everyone come prepared." 
"LATIN 1" 
We're a bunch of wise ones Called the "Baby Latin." All the "ere's"
and the "ire's" We can neatly flatten. If your knowledge is sorta
low And there's something you want to know, Ask the Baby Latin. 
Right this way for the "Baby Latin," Life to us is as soft as satin.
There's nothing we don't know From a hymn book to a show So that is why we're
called "The Baby Latin." 
Now, When Dr. Blews turns up his nose And sniffs the air where'er he goes,
Think not, 'tis pride. He sniffs the air To see if smell of smoke be there.
The jokes in this book are meant To entertain you for a while; There's nothing
in them to prevent You from Indulging in a smile. They'll help you sharpen
up your wits, They'll keep you out of mischief too, And you will find that
there are bits Of wholesome wisdom scattered through.