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Binning, Jack (ed.) / The Wisconsin engineer
Volume 58, Number 1 (October 1953)

Drops, I. R.
Static,   pp. 62-64 ff.

Page 62

ST             T DIC
  A Scotchman and an Irishman were on board a ship
bound for Scotland.
  Scotchman (catching sight of his fatherland): "Hurrah
for Scotland."
  Irishman (riled): "Hurrah, hell."
  Scotchman: "That's right, every man for his own
*    *   *
  Senior: "You forgot to take off your pajamas this
  Freshman: "I didn't. This is my ROTC uniform."
                    *    *    *
  Salesman: "Sir, I have something that's guaranteed
to make you the life of the party, allow you to win friends
and influence people, help you forge ahead in the busi-
ness world, and in general make life a more pleasant
place and invigorating experience."
  Engineer: "I'll take a quart."
  The two gentlemen from Harlem were deep in con-
  "Ah wins," one declared.
  "What you got?"
  "Three aces."
  "No, you doesn't. Ah wins."
  "What you got, man?"
  "Two eights an' a razor."
  "You sho' do. How come you is so lucky, man?"
*    *    *
  C.E.: "Did Fifi blush when
suit broke?"
  Chem.E.: "I didn't notice."
the strap on her bathing
*    *    *
*    *    *
  "Boy, oh boy! That was some blonde with you last
night. Where did you get her?"
  "Dunno. I just opened my billfold and there she was."
                    *    *    *
          I serve a purpose in this school-
            On which no man can frown-
          I quietly sit alone in class
            And keep the average down.
  A lady bought a parrot from a pet store only to learn
that it cursed everytime it said anything. She put up with
it as long as she could, but finally one day she lost her
patience. "If I ever hear you curse again," she declared,
"I'll wring your neck."
  A few minutes later she remarked rather casually that
it was a nice day. Whereupon the parrot promptly said,
"It's a hell of a fine day."
  The lady immediately seized the parrot by his head
and spun him around in the air until he was almost dead.
  "Now, then," she said, "It's a fine day, isn't it?"
  "Fine day!" exclaimed the parrot. "Where in hell were
you when the cyclone struck?"

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